Let's Start Dating!

Polyamory, swinging, BDSM, kink, and whatever else you are reading about, researching, or planning is nice to think about. But if you aren’t taking active steps to cultivate the healthy relationships required to actually act these things out, you are more fan than participant.

So it’s time to stop reading and time to take action!

By following this tutorial, you will move from student to practitioner instantly.

Step 1

Hopefully over the past 12 months, you’ve been taking pictures of yourself in various situations. And, if you are smart, you are backing these up to Google Photos.

You’ll learn how to make your own striking photos in the next article!

Open Google Photos and type in the search term “selfies” at the top.

You will now see a collection of photographs of you. Pick about 10 of them, and then of those, pick your 3 favorites.

Add them to a new Album called Dating Profile Pictures, and them download them. Here is a photo I currently use as one of my three.

Step 2

Register with accounts on OKCupid, MeetMe, and Tinder. These three, and exactly these three. No more, no less.

Fill out the basic information on each, and put in a 1 or 2 sentence profile with exactly what you are looking for. If you are polyamorous, say so. If you are into D/s, say so. If you are straight, bi, or gay, say so.

Now, upload the three favorite photos of you to each of these sites and apps. Set your profile photo as the best one you have. And in Tinder, make sure Smart Photos is active and it will find the most liked of your photos.

There is room for many more pictures, but resist the temptation to start uploading. More is not always better. One bad picture can turn someone off, so put your best self forward.

Step 3

Log in to each service 3 times per day, morning, noon, and night.

In the morning, swipe away. All three applications allow you to swipe likes (though MeetMe is a button, not a swipe. Go through at least 20 photos per day on each app.

In the afternoon, spend time browsing a few profiles and reading their descriptions. Start sending responses to the things you read. DO NOT SAY SIMPLY, “Hi”. Say something that has to do with their profile, and try to ask a question for more information or comment on something that is similar to yourself.

In the evening, look for responses, and respond to people with casual conversation. If you don’t see any responses, which is not unusual, swipe a few more people.


Do this for about 2 weeks, and you will find that you will quickly gain a stream of conversations, likes and possibly dates.

In the next article, we’ll work on improving and updating your photos to cause your potential partners to swoon with lust.

For more information, listen to my podcast on SoundCloud, https://soundcloud.com/dewayne-lehman/p-inc-lets-start-dating